Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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