Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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