fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Randomize
