Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
