I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
