He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
