i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
