I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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