I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
