Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
