Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
