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• (313): View more from Michigan

  so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.

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• (857): View more from Massachusetts

  So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  And why did you do that?

  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  Tequila

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything

  (1-814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(

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