Whod you bang
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
