Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
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