I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
