So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
