Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
