id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I fill condoms, not promises.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
