You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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