Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
