Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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