just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
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