I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
