Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize