I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
