Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
my sisters under your porch take her home
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
