**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Randomize