The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
