she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I supernannyed him into submission
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
