like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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