Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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