Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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