We're like a lot better than the average bears
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize