Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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