I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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