I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
She's the barista slut.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
