After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
