hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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