I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
