My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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