Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
