Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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