Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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