no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
