I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
vagina is talking i cant
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
