Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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