yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
