what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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