take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize