i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
