i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
