I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
